1984

how does the theme of loyalty clash with family when it comes to children and the way the party uses them?

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Children commonly report their parents to the Thought Police, placing the Party above the lives of their mother and father. The Party's eventual goal is to destroy the family unit entirely and have all children raised in Party facilities. The Party has no room for love, unless that love is directed with full force at Big Brother and Oceania.

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http://www.gradesaver.com/1984/study-guide/major-themes/