What is Paul’s experience with Gerard Duval like?

Gerard Duval is the first man Paul killed with his bare hands. He feels immense guilt and cannot cope. Stuck in the hole because of the firing all around him, Paul pictures Gerard and himself as friends, sees how similar they are, and tries to make him more comfortable.... no matter that he's dead. Paul thinks about Gerard's family, promises the dead man he will take care of them, looks through his wallet, and lingers over the pictures of his wife and daughter. Paul even leaves a note in the wallet taking the blame for Gerard's death.