why does missy like to fish even though "youll see the hig ones, the ones nobody was ever going to hook, slipping away under the water like dark brown dreams"?

Missy loved the stillness, the nature, and the wonder of it all,

"I loved fishing those old mud-bottomed ponds. Partly because she would be proud of whatever I dragged out, but also I just loved sitting still. You could smell leaves rotting into the cool mud and watch the Jesus bugs walk on the water, their four little feet making dents in the surface but never falling through. And sometimes you'd see the big ones, the ones nobody was ever going to hook, slipping away under the water like dark-brown dreams."

OMG I DK

IDK YOU MEAAAAAANNNNNN???????????