how does Strayed explain her conflicting relationship with her husband after her Mother's death?

Cheryl has grown up safe in the knowledge of her mother's unconditional love, so when she loses Bobbi, she feels deeply wounded. As her marriage to Paul crumbles, Cheryl also has to accept that it is possible for two people to love one another deeply and still not be able to have a functional relationship. She cannot find the energy to love Paul after her mother's death.