Ivan Kuzmich Podkoliosin
The protagonist of the play, Podkoliosin is an unmotivated Russian bachelor who holds the position of a civil servant (referred to as a forwarding clerk and a court councilor). His opinions and actions are mostly informed by the opinions and actions of others, and the remainder comes about because of his ego. He is noncommittal and flighty, and he dislikes the idea of any kind of restriction on his liberty to do nothing. The plot of the play consists of his humorous and confused efforts both to find a wife and to avoid marriage at any cost.
Kochkariov
Podkoliosin's devoted friend; he is upset when he finds out that Podkoliosin is planning to explore the possibilities of marriage without telling him. He takes it upon himself to play the matchmaker (in the failure of the actual matchmaker) in order to set up his fickle friend with Agafya, manipulating all characters present in the attempt to coerce his friend into marriage.
Agafya Tikhonovna
The young lady who acts as the object of all the suitors' pursuits. She contemplates all the men the matchmaker picks out for her on the basis of her preferences; she is described as being "plump" and reasonably attractive, and her disposition is nervous and indecisive.
Fiokla Ivanovna
The old matchmaker who attempts to set up Agafya with a number of men. She has a tendency to stretch the truth when describing potential mates, and this tendency leads to much conflict and frustration further along in the play.
Stepan
Podkoliosin's servant. Stepan is tolerant and patient with his temperamental and self-absorbed master, doing his duties with remarkable diligence, concision, and self-control.
Arina Panteleimonovna
Arina is the aunt and, it seems, guardian of Agafya. She has a minor role, but she cares for Agafya and expresses dislike for many of her suitors.
Aleksey Dimitrievich Starikov
One of Agafya's suitors, Starikov is a tradesman in the drapery line. Agafya objects to his suit because he is only a minor tradesman, not a gentleman, despite the fact that her own father was a tradesman.
Baltazar Baltazarovich Zhevakin
A comedic character, and another of Agafya's suitors, Zhevakin is a talkative retired military man who fawns over and ingratiates himself to everyone. He constantly brings up his past exploits and anecdotes from the navy, even when they don't fit into the conversation. The main reason he's attracted to Agafya is that she's plump, although it comes to light that this is the seventeenth time he's taken up a suit with a similar girl.
Nikanor Ivanovich Anuchkin
One of Agafya's suitors, Anuchkin is obsessed with refinement and culture. His main attraction to Agayfa is the fact that the matchmaker told him she speaks French (although, as we find out, the veracity of that statement is questionable).
Ivan Pavlovich Yaichnitsa
A remarkably fat man and a suitor to Alina; he seems nice enough but he has a flammable temper. His main attraction to Alina is her (exaggerated by Fiokla) wealth and dowry. His last name is also the butt of several jokes, as "Yaichnitsa" resembles the Russian for "fried eggs/omelet."
