Wholeness vs. Healing
In Remen's personal struggle with chronic illness and in her experiences of other people, she has learned that wholeness is a better goal than healing. While physical healing may not be possible, the integration of the mind and body proves rewarding. Remen has chosen a life dedicated to helping people stop fearing death. Since everyone dies, Remen approaches illness as a human condition. She wants to help people who are suffering to regain a sense of not only wholeness but of humanity. They face the universal end and therefore must look for meaning rather than escape.
Belief in Benevolence
In Remen's discussion of family and the way her grandfather taught her to view the world, she is constantly hunting for signs of the presence of divinity, which she identifies as a benevolent force. Remen looks at every situation as ordered and therefore believes that hidden somewhere in the circumstances is some piece of God. She uses the example of the seedling in the cup of dirt as the first time she recognized that a longterm investment in something seemingly ordinary can yield life. In her experience, the divine is always linked to benevolence because she believes in a God who desires goodness for people. He is the life-giver as well as the life-taker, but Remen finds solace in the belief that both are designed for the best purpose, one which provides meaning and redemption to people.
The Power of Self-Narrative
The other most important bit of wisdom Remen observes from her grandfather is a profession of the power of self-narrative. She uses perspective to transform her circumstances and eventually to help other people transform their lives. In the hospital, Remen serves patients who often face chronic or terminal diagnoses, or the family members of dying patients. She teaches them to engage with their life story, to zoom out and grab onto the goodness that is in their past and to believe that more goodness will exist in their future. In a sense, she is giving people the tools to build resilience.