"'If you judge by appearances in this place,' said Mme de Chartres, 'you will often be deceived, because what appears to be the case hardly ever is."
Mme de Chartres is without a doubt the most wise character in this book. She has the good sense to understand that appearance accounts for very little, an astonishing insight in the midst of a social scene dominated by keeping up appearances. At the same time, she is a shrewd woman. Her insight is shaped by years of experience as a master manipulator.
“There are those to whom we dare give no sign of the love that we feel for them, except in things that do not touch them directly; and, though one dares not show them that they are loved, one would at least like them to see that one does not wish to be loved by anyone else. One would hope them to know that there is no beauty, whatever her rank in society, whom one would not look upon with indifference, and that there is no crown that one would wish to purchase at the price of not seeing them again.”
This is the princess' melancholy conclusion regarding the duke. She loves him from afar and continues to do so throughout her marriage and after her husband's death, when she enters a convent. Her sense of loyalty is so profound that she will never pursue the duke, but she hopes to give him some sign somehow of her fidelity and love for him as well. She takes a detached position, wishing not to complicate anyone's reputation for the sake of emotional gratification, a sign of maturity when compared to her earlier decisions upon arriving at court with her mother.
“My thoughts are violent and uncertain, and I am not able to control them; I no longer think myself worthy of you, nor do I think you are worthy of me; I adore you, I hate you, I offend you, I ask your pardon, I admire you, I blush for my admiration: in a word, I have nothing of tranquillity or reason left about me:”
Driven nearly mad by affection and desire, the princess retreats from both of her lovers. She is losing her sense of self to the possessiveness of the men in her life. Rather than blaming them, she delivers this speech in hopes of explaining her desperate need to retreat. She feels shame for her love of the duke and her lack of feelings for her husband, but she is unwilling to do anything to compromise either man.
