Situational Irony: The irony of focusing on Joss's gender, not music
As the novel opens, the first paragraph sees Millie trying to ignore the many journalists trying to question her about the revelation that Joss was biologically female. After Joss’s death, this scandal is what the public focuses on, not Joss’s undeniable talents as a jazz musician. Kay perhaps suggests that this is a misplaced irony, and one that should not be occurring. The chapter with the reaction of Big Red McCall reiterates this sense of wrong. He refuses to remember Joss as a transgender individual worth gossiping about, but keeps the sacred the memory of him as simply a musician who was extremely talented. This irony also presents the nature of human beings in terms of being prone to gossip, salaciousness, and prurient things, for no matter how accomplished the individual is in life, the press will still jump on any scandal post-mortem.
Situational Irony: The irony of Millie's grief as common
The reader is acutely aware of Millie’s grief, and Kay dedicates whole chapters to the widow’s experience and process of moving through the grief. We witness Millie recalling her and her husband's courting days, early family life, and the records he made as a musician. By going through this process completely alone in their holiday home in Torr, Millie feels loneliness as well as loss. This is lessened slightly by her realization that many women go through the same stages of grief when their husband die. Yet, there is also a sad sense of irony. Millie feels that her love was so strong and for such a unique man, yet her grief is as common as the next woman’s. It is this realized irony that prompts Millie to start returning to normal life, and emerge out of her depths of depression.
Situational Irony: The irony of Sophie Stones' ambition
Soon after the reader is introduced to Sophie Stones, the journalist trying to exploit Joss’s family for the sake of her own success, there is an insight to her family life. She reveals that she has an infinitely more successful sister, and constantly feels as if she has to prove her worth in the family. This brands every action she takes against the Moody family as ironic; she wants to be something in her family, but wants to achieve it by tearing down another.
Situational Irony: The irony of Colman fixating on his father's biological sex
When Colman discovers that his father is biologically female, his reaction is understandably one of extreme confusion. In working through his issues relating to this discovery, Colman fixates on his father’s lack of a penis. This also leads to him feeling he has to prove his own masculinity, which he does by engaging in sexual relations with Sophie Stones and imagining his own genitals as larger than ever. Yet, this fixation on biology is ironic when it is considered that Colman is adopted. Joss was his father in every way but biologically, yet Colman obsesses over the fact he had no penis, despite not being actually created by him. This is a small irony, but still important. For Colman, it is irrelevant whether Joss biologically fathered him; he is instead concerned with how this affects his own fragile masculinity.