Voice
Porges often refers to a woman's "voice," which symbolizes her presence and influence, her ability to articulate herself effectively, and the ability to speak up for what she believes in. Porges offers a number of real-life examples where women have used their voice, including two students who reported a sexual harassment incident on a college campus, using their voice to stand up for themselves.
"Game Face"
At flight school, Marisa recalls feeling overwhelmed and running to the bathroom to cry. While in there, Lieutenant Shannon notices and tells her, "whatever you do, don't let them see you cry. Put on your game face."
Since then, Marisa tells us that this moment still comes to mind when she is faced with challenges and pressure. As such, the phrase "game face" becomes a symbol for putting on a brave face and confronting challenges head-on, while employing a healthy competitive spirit.
Competition
Marisa explores the symbolic associations with competition, both negative and positive. She points out the competitiveness or having a competitive spirit is often seen as a bad thing, especially for young girls: "Competition is conveyed to many young girls as the way that you challenge someone publically, even if you might lose. Competing means sweaty hands, butterflies in your stomach, and sometimes tears. Competing is a bad word."
In contrast to this negative attitude towards competitiveness, Porges invites us to see competition as being effective and important. She writes that we need to "teach our girls to embrace competition and develop critical skills that will help them compete effectively, as kids and adults." Ultimately, according to Porges, competition should be something that we celebrate and encourage.
Sports
For Porges, sports symbolize an opportunity for girls to develop a healthy competitive spirit, while also learning about the significance of teamwork. She says it doesn't matter what type of sport it is "just so long as there is a contest involved that reinforces the practical skills required to effectively compete later in life." As such, sports games are a symbolic opportunity to practice skills that will be needed later in life and helps them to see the positive elements of competitiveness.
Low on fuel
Marisa tells a few stories about her own life throughout the book, including in Chapter 4, where she tells us about an incident that happened when she was working for the U.S Military, when she found herself flying a plane over the Pacific ocean, low on fuel. She describes the experience as being frightening and full of panic but remembers it fondly as it taught her a valuable lesson. For Marisa, the story symbolizes the significance of collaborative problem solving, which she explores in the rest of the chapter.
Katherine Johnson
Marisa remembers going to see a film called Hidden Figures with her school, a film that follows three African-American women working as mathematicians at NASA. She recalls the moment that the character Katherine Johnson was allowed to join an important meeting for the Space Task Group, and the influence she had in developing a new equation. Ultimately, for Marisa, this character symbolizes the potential for women in the workplace, and what they can achieve if they speak up, believe in themselves, and stay true to who they are, despite the obstacles put in their way.
Speaking to Obama
Marisa tells the story about when she met President of the United States, Barack Obama. The first time she met him she was reluctant to speak up, but the second time she made sure to speak her mind and use her voice. Overall, this encounter represents Marisa's ability to find her voice despite facing pressure, and she concludes that "my memory of that day reminds me why, even as an adult, I have to push myself to find my voice." As such, this encounter also represents the importance of going out of your comfort zone, even as an adult.
Jerusalem
Marisa recounts the time she spoke traveled to Yemen and spoke to a former member of Al-Qaeda, called Walid. The two speak about their religious beliefs, and Walid asks her if she had visited Jerusalem. She responds that, like him, she hadn't visited, and he "takes it as a small symbol of unity." As such, although they have different religious beliefs, they are united by the fact they haven't visited Jerusalem.
Marisa's notebooks
Marisa tells us that while she went on missions with the U.S military, she kept a series of notebooks, jotting down special memories and things she wanted to remember about her adventures. She concludes that the "notebook contained insights I wanted to keep safe, no matter what else happened," and therefore symbolized her memories and things she learned along the way.
Parents
In the text, Marisa argues that parents have a huge influence on their children, and that young girls will absorb things from their surroundings like a sponge. As such, she offers some great advice to parents about how to best nurture and foster traits such as assertiveness, empathy, and competitiveness.
For example, she tells the reader that one strategy to foster a healthy competitive spirit is to "celebrate your own wins, bringing family role models front and center for your girls." As such, we see that parents symbolize potential for the future, especially for young girls who are looking for role models.
Inspirational women
Marisa introduces a number of inspirational women in the text, who symbolizes the possibilities women have to achieve and succeed in the world of work. This includes Lieutenant Shannon, the only female instructor pilot in Marisa's squadron, who was admired for her hard-working attitude and for her achievements. As such, Shannon is a symbol of what women can achieve if they "put on their game face" and work hard.
Women underestimating themselves
Women underestimating themselves is a key motif in the book, and Porges gives many real-life examples from her own life, and from friends and colleagues. For example, Marisa tells us about the "missed chances to network in a room full of men, when I underrated my natural ability to develop relationships and connect with others."
Later, Marisa speaks to Julissa Marenco, a bold and successful woman who acknowledges that women often underestimate themselves in the workplace, therefore becoming their own worst enemy and denying themselves opportunities, promotions, and pay rises.
Natural abilities
In the book, Porges points to a number of essential traits and skills women are more naturally adept at, including empathy and working with others. The natural advantages and skills of women are key motifs in the text and are referenced by Porges often so that parents remember to foster and nurture the skills that come to women naturally, according to research.
