The lens of sociability
To become an influential person that makes friends easily, Carnegie encourages his reader to view friendship a certain way. He starts by eliminating some false ideas from the reader. First of all, a person is not judged for being, but for performance. By seeing the world through the lens of social performance, a person can begin to see the truth of specific social effects. Then, people can modulate their approach until they get the results they want.
The lens of absolute encouragement
Another lens can be applied to a person's worldview to help them modulate their performance. Carnegie asks his reader to consider a new practice: Absolute positivity and encouragement. Instead of being the kind of person who has negative experiences with certain people or personality types, Carnegie says that an influential person must be willing to be friends with any personality. This means that a person will have to try seeing what there is about other people to enjoy and celebrate, abandoning their judgment and criticism.
The hypothetical friendship
Eventually, the model for a good friendship emerges. Carnegie sees friendship and influence as connected concepts, because a friend is someone who wants to do what will help you. To make a friend is to have a person who, if they asked for help, you would be thrilled to help them, and if you asked them for help, they would be thrilled to help you. This mutual rapport is the model for a good friendship, and the model for influence follows: a person is highly influential when people want to be their friend.
The lens of human biology and psychology
This last imagery is one that Carnegie urges his reader to use responsibly. The goal of viewing social situations for their biological and psychological aspect is not to manipulate or use other people. Instead, psychology should be employed so that one has a correct perspective so they can navigate social situations successfully. He says that the tools of psychology can be used to help others feel important and understood.
